The second day of January gets no exclamation point. Today’s pop quiz in the form of a multiple choice question:
What assorted objects did I find under the bed frame I disassembled?
a) Copious amounts of dog hair
b) A roll of laundry quarters
c) An empty roll of laundry quarters
d) The Democratic Party’s ‘nads
e) A solid gold 14K guitar pick
f) A village of Smurfs
g) A full set of Supreme Court Justice “Beanie Babies”
h) A dismembered toe from the last time I tried to take the bed apart while wearing no shoes.
i) A post-it that says, “Stop procrastinating and get back to packing.”
j) A magazine article about the dot com industry propelling America’s economy to new heights touting that “even God himself couldn’t stop this techno-economical juggernaut.”
k) A shrink ray gun so I can fit all this crap in my car.