Ladies and gentlemen. America.
I do not watch nor have I ever watched American Idol. I don’t like “Reality” TV shows. But I do know who Clay Aiken is because the cable news channels insist on this entertainment crud. I know that Clay Aiken recently had a baby, a daughter. I also am aware of the fact that he very insistently declared himself gay on a magazine (“People”?) cover.
Is it small-minded of me to be confused by this? I mean, I’ve stated many times (although this is the first time in the WordPress blog) that I believe that sexuality is a spectrum. Our notion of sexuality is about as sophisticated as our notions of race circa the 1890’s.
The only problem I have with gay people is that I don’t like stereotypes. By that, I mean living walking stereotypes. (This goes for any other segment of the population as well. I’m talking to you, black guy with dreads. Hipsters with giant smoked lens aviator glasses.) I realize that many stereotypes come about because people who identify with a certain … uh, whats’ the word … style? Lifestyle? I figure that people often adopt the behaviors of the communities they want to identify with and of course it’s self-reinforcing because being around people who act like you enforces the behaviors, speech patterns and blah blah blah.
WHERE AM I GOING WITH THIS
Not that it matters what I think. And even if you’re a flaming self-described “queer” in a halter top and cut-off jeans wearing mascara, hey. It’s your life, kid. I may not agree. I may not approve. It may make me uncomfortable, but still, I bear no ill will.
(I’m about to get myself in trouble here.) If you’re gay and don’t want to be gay anymore for whatever reason. Religious, social, sick of it. Whatever. You have every right to pursue straightness.
I know that offends some people, but I don’t understand why we consider gayness to be more real or true or powerful than straightness. If a guy is effete or comes out of the closet, people act like it’s his true identity and that he was just in denial all of those years.
If a gay guy says he’s straight or wants to live as a heterosexual, people act like he and anyone who supports him is self-hating or is a homophobic hatemonger.
If a gay guy has sex with a woman and has a child, that doesn’t affect his gay status/credentials.
If a straight guy has sex with a man, he’s considered gay. Period. Or bisexual, maybe?
TANGENT #1: LARRY CRAIG AND THE BISEXUAL MOVEMENT (apparently, there is one)
While I was looking for quotes from Clay Aiken for this blog, I was distracted by a wikipedia entry. Apparently, bisexual groups are offended because they feel they’re being denied their identity. Or that people deny the existence of bisexuality.
Quote someone I know: “You either $!#@ $#! or you don’t.”
For example, the media (like the Daily Show, for example) ran with Larry “Wide Stance” Craig’s airport restroom sex solicitation scandal. Basically, they said that Larry Craig is obviously, and like so many of the hypocritical family values types, a closeted homosexual. This, despite the fact that he’s married and I think has kids.
So the bisexual folks are like, “Hey! What about our existence here? Huh?”
whoa. i’m experiencing deja vu.
TANGENT #2: HIV IN DC
One second for a detour here. I heard on an NPR report about HIV in DC, they say that 20% of people in DC are HIV+. That’s one in five. I don’t understand how that’s even possible. Is that just residents? Including the homeless?
The interesting part was that the black community says, “Oh, that’s that gay disease.”
The gay community says, “That’s a black disease.”
Everybody thinks it’s somebody else’s problem. But according to the report, HIV isn’t being transmitted because everyone has a dozen partners and sharing needles. The transmission is happening within nearly monogamous relationships. Yes, that’s an oxymoron. Nearly monogamous.
People don’t know their partner’s HIV status. Never think to ask. Black women are among the fastest growing segment of the population. Spreading, spreading.
“Hey, your end of the boat is sinking. Loser.”
BACK TO THE MATTER AT HAND
Clay Aiken. You’re disturbing the force! Women already vastly appreciate the company of gay men to straight men. If women can have sex with their gay male friends, too, the balance is disturbed. Disturbed, I say! Curse you.
And isn’t something wrong with that last paragraph? Oh, I pine for simpler times.